All Wrapped Up With a Ribbon On Top
by carzor4
Summary: Hannah Lee, a 18-year old with parents that are frequently away lives next door to best friend Alyssa Nelson, a 17-year old, with similar circumstances. As otakus, they love the show Naruto. So what will happen when they discover a box full of kittens that somehow resemble the Akatsuki? ItachixOC, DeidaraxOC, PeinxKonan. Rated T for language and themes. ON HIATUS.
1. All Wrapped Up With a Ribbon On Top

Hey guys! This is my first story, so I'm really sorry if it sucks. This isn't a very serious story, but it may become one later on. This story was originally on Wattpad, but I decided to move it here instead. This story is a ItachixOC and DeidaraxOC story, and fair warning to non censored/inappropriate words. I am aware of the overused 'Akatsuki Kittens' topic of this story, but who cares? This story is just for fun, and if you don't like it, don't read it! To those who actually like it, have fun reading! ~C4

Disclaimer: I do not own the Naruto franchise in any shape or form. This is 'Fan'Fiction for a reason...

* * *

Nobody's P.O.V.

The 17-year old girl sighed as she trudged down the street, tired after another day of school. Her black hair swayed with her steps, and her vivid green eyes closed in slight fatigue. She enjoyed the peace of silence while she could get it.

* * *

?'s P.O.V.

"Hey! Wait up!" My friend yelled loudly.

A 17-year old girl with long blond hair that reached her waist that typically was tied up in a ponytail and sky blue eyes ran up to me.

'_So much for the peace and quiet,_' I thought, but I smiled slightly at my panting friend.

"What's up Alyssa?" I said, giggling a little at her flushed face.

"What's so funny Hannah!?" Alyssa whined. This only made me laugh more.

"Your face..." I managed to get out between snickers.

She pouted cutely, but it still only made me laugh more. "Okay, did you come here only to bother me, or did you actually have something to say?" I grinned impishly. That's right, even though everyone at school thought I'm a seriously nerdy nerd, which was probably due to the fact that my test scores were always in the top 5 in the school, I actually am quite the diverse girl when it comes to my demeanor. I can be serious at times, and murderous when someone tries to or hurts Alyssa, my best friend who is like my sister. I can also be shy, quiet, mischievous, funny, sarcastic, perverted at times...should I go on?

She grinned widely. "Nope! Just wanted to bother you!" Typical Alyssa.

We continued to walk down our street until we reached our houses, which were side by side, with a tree near the middle. I smiled at the flashback I had at the sight.

* * *

_Flashback - Hannah's P.O.V._

_I ran outside as I heard a loud thump outside near our front yard. I whipped my head around frantically, looking for the source of the sound._

_"Owies..." A childish voice cried out. I turned my gaze to the source of the sound._

_A young girl that looked about my age was crumpled up underneath the tree that was between my yard and the house next door. She had medium length blond hair tied up in pigtails and blue, blue eyes. In her hair, there were leaves and twigs sticking out. If it hadn't looked like it had hurt, I probably would have laughed at the comical sight. I winced at he sight. I composed myself and cleared my throat._

_"What are you doing?" I said. The girl stopped rubbing he head and looked at me._

_"Huh? Oh! I'm sorry! I...uh...I'm the...um..." she stammered out. Her face turned bright red._

_"You're the what? And by the way, you might want to get out from underneath that tree, because it's technically in my yard. You're trespassing." I said bluntly in monotone, and she squeaked in surprise and fear. I smirked softly._

_"Don't worry, I wont sell you out. I'm just kidding. But seriously, what are you doing underneath our tree?" I asked. She grinned in response._

_"I wanted to climb the tree!" She chirped loudly. I stared incredulously at her, and shook my head._

_"Let me get this straight...you climbed the tree that is in my yard, damaging quite a few branches in the process, not bothering to ask who the owner of the tree was, just for the heck of it?" I snapped._

_She gulped in fear of my dark aura surrounding me. "Uhhh...yeah?"_

_My dark aura disappeared, and I grinned. "Sounds legit. My names Hannah, by the way. I'm nine." I lent her my hand and pulled her up._

_"I'm Alyssa! I moved in here yesterday!" Alyssa pointed at her house. "I'm eight."_

_After chatting for about an hour, I figured out that she had moved here because of her parent's work. I had moved here due to the same thing._

_After that encounter, we eventually became the best of friends who would tell each other anything and everything. Alyssa, who I figured out was actually pretty shy, opened up considerably to me, just as I did to her._

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

"Yay! Were home!" Alyssa shouted, being her usual loud self. I hit the back of her head with my fist lightly, but enough to make it hurt.

"Owww..." she mumbled. I smirked in reply. I walked up to her house's front door and opened it dramatically.

"I'm home! Hey Mom!" I shouted. Alyssa's Mom was almost like a second mother to me, due to the fact that our mothers were extremely close, and she was always there if I needed her. Therefore, I called Alyssa's mom 'Mom' and Alyssa did the same for mine.

"Oh! Hello Hannah, how was school?" She asked, wiping her hands on her apron as she stopped cooking to look at me. I smiled happily and replied.

"I'm good. School was boring as usual though." My smile turned into a small frown.]

"Oh...well, just one more year!" she said cheerfully.

"Have a nice day!" I shouted back as I opened the door and headed towards my house. On the way, I noticed a medium plain cardboard box next to the trash can. _'That wasn't there before...'_ I thought as I approached the box. I slowly opened the box and I blinked. Then my eyes widened in horror.

* * *

I love cliffies. Too bad most of you already can guess whats going to happen... Oh well.

Oh yeah! To those lovely readers, there is a very lonely button below that says 'Review'. Also, I completely accept flames/criticism. Those are what make my bad stories better. If you have any suggestions, please also put them in the reviews. I possibly will take OC requests, however probably no more than 2, because I hate it when there are too many OC's, and then it just gets confusing.

Have a nice day/morning/afternoon/evening/night!


	2. Out of Sight, Out of Mind

New chappie!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, I would be lying out on a lawn chair in front of a huge pool instead of sitting in front of a laptop.

* * *

?'s P.O.V.

"So...what do we do, un?" A voice said uncertainly, tail flicking nervously.

"It's not like we can do anything right now, brat! Look at us!" a different voice snarled.

"So mean Danna..."

"Tobi want to get out of this box! Tobi is hungry!" a childish voice mewled loudly.

"Shut UP, un! No one gives a crap!"

"Where are we?"

"How the fuck would we fucking know, asshole!"

"Everybody, quiet!" Leader-sama yelled over the clamor of voices. This got everyone's attention, and they all quieted down, except I heard a small grumble form Hidan, who said "Stupid fucking money loving bastard..."

"We should assess the situation calmly. Yelling and screaming is not the way to make it any better. Itachi, can you find any familiar chakra signals?" I shook my head.

"No Leader-sama. It seems we have been placed under a justu which transports us to another world." I replied calmly in monotone.

"How the fuck do you know that Uchiha fucker?! And what the fuck do you mean, another fucking world?!" Hidan snarled loudly.

"There are no chakra signals around us, even though there are clearly humans around us. I believe I have read about a forbidden jutsu to send the victim to another dimension somewhere." I was interrupted in my explanation as we all looked around, hearing footsteps coming toward us. The flaps of the box opened to reveal a pretty girl with black hair and green eyes. She blinked once, twice, before her eyes widened in terror.

* * *

REALLY short chapter, I know. I hate them too. I'm just uploading from Wattpad, so I'm too lazy to actually write anything.

Good day.


	3. Out of the Frying Pan and Into the Fire

Nobody's P.O.V.

"What the fuck?! Who the hell is she?!" Hidan yelled.

"Shit! Does she recognize us?" Deidara swore loudly.

"What else can explain it?! She looks like she's seen a ghost or something!" Sasori shouted bluntly.

"Tobi is not a ghost!" Tobi whined.

"Pein-sama...what should we do?" Konan asked worriedly.

Pein said nothing, but his face portrayed he was nervous.

All of a sudden, they stopped as the girl reached into the box.

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

I looked, horrified, at the box of oddly colored kitties.

They stared back, silent. All of a sudden, they started meowing and yowling loudly, and trying to paw out of the box. A few even snarled at each other. I reached in my hand and they all froze again. I took out my hand again as if it were on fire. We stared at each other for a few moments, before I flipped out.

"What the hell! Who were the owner of the cats before? These definitely are not their original coat colors! Whoever was your owner was obviously cruel..." I exclaimed angrily. I reached in again and gently picked up a petite indigo kitty that I had established was a girl with a small white patch on the side of her head and amber eyes. A ginger cat narrowed his peculiar purple-gray eyes with rings in them and hissed softly at me. She squirmed a little as I secured her in my arms. I parted her fur to try and find the original fur color, but didn't succeed. I also checked for a name tag, but I didn't find that either. I gently stroked her head afterward, and set her back in the box.

"Okay...I don't want to leave you guys here...but I can't just randomly take you in..." I said softly, and backed away. However, I stopped from the pleading and desperate looks from the kitties, and I sighed.

"You guys are too adorable to leave alone...well, at least my mom and dad won't mind too much...probably," I sighed, and I swear some of the cats were laughing at me.

I smiled, and said, "Well, since no one seems to really want you, I guess I'll take you guys in. At least we won't have to worry about space..." I trailed off, reminiscing about my overly large house for 3 people, with 2 people chronically gone. Alyssa's house was big too, but she liked staying over at my house better.

I picked up the box with a little difficulty, but I was able to secure it in my arms. However, the cats were all meowing and trying to get out. I sighed, and I walked over to my front door and had to kick it open because of my lack of free hands. I set down the box in the living room, and the cats all gawked at the spacious stylishly decorated room.

"Welcome to your new home kitties."

* * *

I swear, sometime these short chapters will stop. Please give love to that little lonely button down below called 'Review'.

Also, if you have not, read Consider Yourselves Kitties by DaniZaraki and the rest of her Kitty Trilogy.

It is freaking AWESOME.

Also, a few other ones I like are Kitty Kurse by Ailarii (whose username, btw, I love), Akatsukittens by The-Music-Loving-Anime-tard, and Akatsuki Kittens by XxXMiiDNiGhTXxX (whose username I also love but is impossible to write). I command you to read all of these awesome pieces of work.

Peace out.


	4. If You Can't Beat Them, Join Them

Hello! New chapter, which starts my list of chapters not uploaded from Wattpad.

* * *

Nobody's P.O.V.

"Holy shit... is this girl rich or something?" Kakuzu meowed in awe, with money symbols in his eyes.

"Shut the fuck up, greedy ass fucker..." Hidan muttered, hearing a hiss from his partner, spurring him to hiss back and they got ready to pounce on each other.

"Hey! No fighting! If you do, I'll fucking fix you! Jeez, testosterone filled males..." Hannah shouted angrily at the now confused and scared immortal duo, while the other cats were either laughing at the zombie partners' predicament, or smirking in amusement. Pein, who had been ready to stop them by physical means, sat back down smirking while his partner Konan was barely containing a smile at Hannah's true words.

Hidan and Kakuzu grumbled while shooting nasty looks at the other. However, a quick glare from Hannah shut them right up.

"Well, now that that's settled, what should we do?" Konan asked in a quiet voice to her leader.

"I believe that we should gather information about our current location, and how to get out of these bodies. Itachi, you are in charge of figuring this out," Pein addressed everyone in an authoritative voice, and Itachi dipped his head in confirmation. "The rest of you, treat our owner kindly and do not attempt to harm her. She is the key for our survival in our vulnerable situation, and I will not have anyone of you messing our chance up. Am I clear?" Everyone nodded in assent.

"Alright then, you are all dismissed."

Everyone milled about, unsure of what to do, when Hannah decided to officially make them her pets.

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

"Alright! Time for names!" I shouted, and all of the cats turned to me startled.

"What? Geez, just because I seem so serious doesn't mean I actually am," I muttered and sighed.

The cats all looked mildly confused, but they came to me anyway. I picked up a medium cat that was a dull red color, with brownish reddish eyes. He stared blankly at me as I stared back. This continued for a few moments before I said, "You shall be known as...Jake." This caused him to blink, and the yellow cat seemed to be snorting in laughter as Jake narrowed his eyes. I giggled a little, but I pet his head soothingly.

"It's okay Jake, you're very cute. No need to feel jealous of Blondie over there." His eyebrow began to twitch, but I held in my giggles and kissed him sweetly on the forehead.

I picked up the very big dark brown cat next. His fur seemed to have stitches, but it turned out to be fur. His eyes were very peculiar, being green, but the edges seemed red. "Okay big guy, what should I name you?" I wondered out loud, and a silver cat seemed to snort at the mention of 'big guy'. I frowned at said silver cat, but I turned back to the cat I was holding. "You will be Stitches." He didn't seem so bothered by the name, and he crawled off my lap.

I picked up the silver one that was laughing at Stitches, and he started yowling at and scratching me in protest. My eyes narrowed, and I let loose my evil aura. "Co. Op. Er. A. T. E!" I snarled at him, enunciating each syllable while he stopped in fear and confusion. I huffed, and continued. "You shall be known as Snowflake." He started yowling again, and all the other cats started snickering. I held him away from my body boredly, so he couldn't scratch me. This caused everyone to laugh harder. I put him down, and he was only stopped from tackling me by an auburn orange cat hissing at him, causing him to sulk silently.

I gently scooped up the one I had decided was my favorite, a deep black tom with beautiful onyx eyes. He seemed to be one of the calmest out of all the cats, and he didn't seem to mind like the others when I stroked his head. I smiled softly while hugging him to my chest him and kissed his nose. He purred softly and nuzzled his head into my cheek. "You shall be Karasu, or Kara for short." I set him down, and I picked up the brute of his partner. He was HUGE, and was a light blue color with markings under his eyes that looked like gills. I snickered while I said, "You shall now be Pescado." He seemed confused as I snorted with laughter and set him down.

"I'll get 'Lyssa, and she can help name the other ones. Don't go anywhere kitties!" I quickly walked over to Alyssa's house, and rung the doorbell a few times.

The door swung open and Alyssa was there, who looked confused. "Come on! I have to show you something!" I yelled, and I pulled her out before shutting the door behind her, and dragged her to my house.

I dragged her to the living room and she saw the cats. I, knowing what was going to happen, quickly covered my ears.

"OHMIGOSH YOU HAVE CATS WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME OHMIGOD THIS IS SOOOO AWESOME! WHERE DID YOU GET THEM?!" She screamed in delight and the cats looked absolutely shocked. I smacked the back of her head, and she pouted in pain and had tears in her eyes. "Owwww...you're so mean Hannah, that really hurt." I rolled my eyes, "Drama queen. I found them in a box next to my trash can." I frowned. She looked at them with pity in her eyes.

"Okay, I actually dragged you over here to name these little fellas," I said, getting back on track when I saw her mouth form into a smirk. I smacked my forehead in frustration, but smirked in response to her reference. "No, not in that way Alyssa." She snickered, and she turned to the now thoroughly confused cats.

"Hmmm...which have you named so far?" I pointed to Jake, Stitches, Snowflake, Karasu, and Pescado and said their names in turn. She nodded sagely, and I snickered.

"I think that one should be Kyo," she said while pointing at the orange cat with stops on his face. I nodded in assent to the name, and said, "Well then, I think that one should be Lily. She's really pretty, and the only girl in the group." I scratched under her chin gently, and Alyssa turned to the yellow cat. She squealed, and rushed over to pick him up. "Yellow kitty!" she squealed, and the kitty looked shocked, but got over it. "I shall now name you Blondie," she said with a straight face and serious tone.

It was silent for a few moments.

Then I burst out laughing.

"Oh my god, that's hilarious," I laughed while trying to catch my breath. She and everyone else smirked, but Jake was snorting in laughter.

I picked up the weirdest cat of them all. He was half black, half white. Literally. On his left side, he was completely white, and on his right he was completely black. His eyes were a bright yellow. "I shall name you...Kevin." Alyssa laughed while petting a hyperactive kitty that was black, but was orange on his face, with a swirl of black on it. "This one should be called Lollipop!" The faces of my cats were priceless.

I couldn't help it.

I burst out laughing.

Our cats are going to go through some seriously weird shit when they live with us.

* * *

I don't really like the ending of this one...

And by the way, At Night We Rise, it's probably because that was the latest chapter I had uploaded. I started this story on FF today :D.

Review please.

Sayonara, minnasan.


	5. A Stitch In Time Saves Nine

Hello! I keep forgetting to do disclaimers.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the Akatsuki. I wish I did though. Dirty thoughts...

* * *

Nobody's P.O.V.

"What the hell is up with my name?" Hidan swore, earning a snicker from Kakuzu.

"I though it suited you though," Kakuzu coughed, trying to hide his laughter.

"Be quiet," Pein commanded. "You will have to deal with the names until we regain our true form."

"How will we accomplish that Leader-sama?" Itachi asked quietly.

Pein shook his head. "I'm sure we will find a way."

* * *

Meanwhile, Hannah watched as the cats conversed quietly among themselves. 'I'm glad I saved them before something bad happened to them...' she thought, while beginning to twirl a lock of her long black hair around her finger, her green eyes closing in tiredness, the adrenaline of finding the cats now wearing off. Alyssa was busy playing with Lollipop, who was happily scampering around while she help a cat toy in front of him, waving it around. Hannah smiled, before a sudden thought came up when Blondie's stomach growled loudly.

"Oh my god!" she exclaimed, startling both Alyssa and the cats.

"What is it?" Alyssa eyed her friend worriedly.

"I forgot to feed the cats!" Hannah said, like the world was going to fall apart. Alyssa smacked her forehead with her palm, and sighed.

"Please don't scare me like that. I thought something was really wrong." Hannah rubbed her head sheepishly.

"Sorry. I'm going to get some food for them." She got up, and walked toward the kitchen, where she got out a big chunk of leftover cold ham from the fridge. She began chopping it into bite sized pieces, and placed it into 10 bowls. She returned, and set the bowls down near her pets. They all came to check out their food. They sniffed it curiously, before eating it. Snowflake, Blondie, and Kevin ate almost ravenously. Lollipop and Pescado ate it happily, and Jake, Stitches, Kara, Kyo, and Lily ate it calmly.

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

I giggled at their responses, and I remembered another of the things I forgot to do. I instructed Alyssa to watch over the kitties, and I drove out to the local pet store 5 minutes away to get litter boxes and litter. After driving back and deeming my cats were perfectly healthy during my 20 minute long disappearance, I set up the litter boxes. Luckily, they seemed to know what to do in them (which meant I didn't need to teach them how).

Outside, it was starting to get darker, and the sky had turned a beautiful mix of orange, pink, and red. I shooed my cats and Alyssa into my room, and she and I took turns showering in my bathroom. That was when, another thought dawned on me. Since I found them in a box, they should probably be cleaned. So Alyssa and I took the cats into the bath room, and set them into my bathtub that was really big. Then again, with parents as rich as mine and a big house, it was expected that the tub was really luxurious. Like, as big for 10 people to fit in it without being cramped. I turned on the tap to warm, and surprisingly the cats didn't seem bothered by the fact that they were getting a bath at all; in fact, they looked bored. As the water reached their paws, a loud poof was heard in the room.

"Oh geez, smoke much?" I coughed out. I looked up to see 10 familiar figures standing in my bathtub.

* * *

Itachi's P.O.V.

I stood still in the bathtub obediently as Hannah started to turn the water on. Everyone behaved, just like how Pein expected them to, something that took me by surprise. Turning my thoughts back to Hannah, I let my thoughts wander about her. She seemed very peculiar, but he had to admit she was pretty.

Wait, what?

The thought stirred something in my chest, something I hadn't felt in a long time since the massacre. I shook my head, trying to rid my head of the thought. I didn't need feelings, not anymore. If everything went according to my plan, I would die by Sasuke's hand and Sasuke would be a hero and have his revenge. However, the feeling stayed.

Something was special about this girl. The girl with long silky black hair that flowed behind her when she walked, the vibrant forest green eyes that filled with adoration as she stroked my head and kissed my nose, the smell of fruit I smelled when she hugged me and gave me my name.

I shook my head, trying to force myself to not think about her in that way anymore.

I have only known her for about a day, but I could tell the type of person she was. She was the type that boys wished they could build up the courage to ask her to date them. She was the beautiful girl who was oblivious to her appearance, and didn't ever flaunt it. Even if she did like me, she deserved someone who could be with her until she died. Someone who was normal. Not a S-ranked criminal who rid himself of feelings, and would end up dying in a couple of years.

She deserved someone who would have a bright future with her.

The water now reached my paws, and I felt a slight tug on me, the same feeling when I henge, or make a clone.

A loud poof filled the room, and my eyes widened as I realized I was in my human form again. Everyone else in the Akatsuki was human too. Hannah and Alyssa took not of this, and their eyes widened too.

And then they blushed the color of cherries. I realized that everyone of us were in the nude, and I berated myself.

There was no way they were going to trust us after this.

I could only wait until they reacted to tell what were to become of us.

* * *

Alyssa's P.O.V.

The room erupted with smoke, and I heard Hannah coughing. "Oh geez, smoke much?" she coughed, before both of us froze.

In the tub, there were 10, very familiar figures. 10 VERY familiar figures.

They were the Akatsuki.

Suddenly, my mind was filled with memories of those FanFictions of the Akatsuki coming to our world in the form of kittens. I scolded myself inwardly as I finally processed in my brain that the cats Hannah found looked very similar to the Akatsuki.

Somehow, that seemed to be the least of my problems when I noticed one other thing. They were naked. Slowly, Hannah and I blushed, and I could feel the heat coming from my own cheeks.

The silence was held for a few more moments as my gazed traveled over a naked long blond-haired boy. I could sense that Hannah's gaze was also traveling over a naked long black-haired boy, before we screamed.

Hannah's P.O.V.

As the smoke filled the room, I focused my eyes on the humanoid figures standing in my tub.

Akatsuki.

My eyes widened, and I noticed something very important.

They were naked.

'Oh my god' I thought. I felt my cheeks heating up In a blush. My eyes lingered over a certain body of a hot male with long black hair and black eyes, which were suddenly bleeding into red with black spots in them. my gaze traveled downwards, when my blush became darker.

I did the one thing I could think of as all of this sunk in.

I screamed.

The Akatsuki flinched at my loud scream, but I cut it off as I pushed Alyssa behind me protectively. I always had been a motherly or older sister figure to her ever since she moved here, and the mother lion was showing up now in my movements. Pushinge her back toward the door, indicating for her to leave. She glanced worriedly at me, but I didn't let her protest, and she left the bathroom.

As I looked back at the Akatsuki, I decided to take pity on a certain member. Noticing that she was the only female, I took a simble white robe off a rack and wrapped it around her. I deemed her as the person who I would speak to easiest, so I dragged her outside the room as well, and I shut the door and locked it, but that probably wouldn't help much. We were talking wbout S-ranked criminals who were ninjas, and could probably kill us in a split second.

"Um...thank you for the robe..." Konan stated quietly, wrapping it around herself. I smiled weakly, and replied, "It was nothing. Besides you were the only female, so I didn't want to leave you there.". It was quiet for a few seconds, before I nervously asked in a small voice, "You guys...aren't going to kill us right?" I asked, but dread started pooling in my stomach. She looked at me in surprise. "No," she said, "why would we do that?" The look on my face gave it away, and she flinched slightly. Alyssa suddenly perked up. "We have valuable information...so please don't kill us..." she wimpered quietly. "I don't want to die."

Konan looked between the both of us before sighing. "I'll talk to Pein-sama about what we should do." I nodded. "Also, please tell them that they should use the towels on the counter to cover up and to come out here," I said, and I saw Alyssa gulp in the corner. Konan nodded, unlocked the door, and stepped inside, closing the door behind her.

My room was silent except for the soft breathing of Alyssa and I. We could only hear muffles throught he bathroom door. Alyssa and I both looked at each other sadly, and I said, "Don't worry Lyssi. We'll get through this." She nodded, but it seemed like I was trying to convince myself more than her. "Hannah, we should tell them what we know. It would be a good bargaining chip, and they probably won't kill us then," she replied shakily. I walked over to her and hugged her tightly. She hugged me back, and we realeased each other after a moment. The omonous sound of a door handle turning interrupted our moment.

* * *

Akatsuki's P.O.V.

The Akatsuki watched as Konan stepped back in the bathroom, a robe wrapped around her body.

"Use the towels on the counter to cover up," she said, not looking up at the rest of the males.

After everyone had covered up, Deidara asked, "Leader-sama? What should we do now, un?" Pein sighed, and said, "I do not know yet Deidara. However, we will not kill the girls. They are too valuable for that." They all had seen the recognition in their eyes as they saw them go back to their true forms. Also, the immeadiate protective reaction she had over Alyssa had proven she had known what their abilities where.

Konan visibly relaxed as she heard that they weren't going to die. "They want you to go to Hannah's room," Konan stated, and they all walked over to the door, and Pein turned the door handle, opened the door, and stepped through.

* * *

Nobody's P.O.V.

As Pein and co. stepped through the door and into the room, Hannah steeled herself up to answer whatever questions they were going to ask her. Alyssa, now not in her usual cheerful personality, was eyeing the Akatsuki warily.

Pein addressed the girls bluntly, "What do you know of us?" Hannah winced slightly, and all of the sympathetic members of the organization had to feel bad for the duo. They bothed looked like the world was going to end.

Hannah took a breath as she started her explanation. "In our world, there is a television and book series called Naruto, which is made by a guy called Masashi Kishimoto. The story revolves wround Naruto, the nine-tails jinchuuriki. However, you guys show up in the stories as well. We know that you guys are a criminal organization of S-ranked criminals. We know that Pein is the leader, Konan cna use paper for her jutsu, Sasori and Deidara use 'art' as their weapons, Hidan worships Jashin and Kakuzu like money, Itachi has the Sharingan and Kisame has Samehada. Tobi is annoying and Zetsu is a cannibal. I also know more private info about you guys, but no one wants to hear that." As she let the info sink in, the Akatsuki looked positively shocked. Pein dipped his head, and said, "We have come to a decision. You will..."

* * *

Long chapter. Review please!


	6. Opportunities Are Spawned From Crisis

Hey guys!

I'm going to update a little slower now (can't exactly go as fast as 3 or 4 chapters a day), something like a chapter every two days.

And Itachi does not love Hannah, this isn't going to be a 'he looked at her, she looked at him, they kissed' story. I'm going to try and have emotional development, but if I make a sequel it's probably going to be more in the sequel, cause this is more of a crack fic than a philosophical one. He has an _eensy weensy_ crush though. I think I made him OOC.

Oops.

Enjoy ze chappies!

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

"You will serve as the Akatsuki's caretakers while we are in this world. That means you shall feed us, clothe us, give us a place to sleep, and will give us information regarding our futures," Pein explained.

I couldn't help but let the relief flood my previously adrenaline filled body and I sunk down the wall I was standing next to and to the floor. I looked next to me, and Alyssa looked happy.

"Thank you…" I murmured.

"Why would you thank us for requiring 10 S-ranked criminals to be taken care of in your house?" Itachi asked, which caused me to look at him, only to look away in embarrassment as I remembered practically ogling him when he was naked. Hopefully he didn't see me do that...

"Well, it's totally not because instead of killing two girls with no ways of defending themselves and instead only making them clothe, feed, and give a place to sleep. Nope, not that indeed," I said in a deadpan voice. This caused the corner of his mouth twitch up a bit, before disappearing.

Score! I (almost) made Itachi Uchiha smile!

"Won't you have trouble taking care of an extra 10 people for at least a month or so?" Sasori asked boredly. "I thought you could tell from the size of my house, but apparently not. Both of Alyssa and my parents are business people. They make a LOT of money, but aren't home much. Alyssa moved here when she was 8 or something because of it," I explained.

"We are aware that we are not the...quietest people you could host. How will you explain the noise?" Konan spoke quietly. I snickered.

"Even if it may not seem like it, Hannah and I scuffle a lot. It's normal for there to be screams coming randomly from our house. Come to think of it, that must sound so wrong..." Alyssa smirked and wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, causing me to smirk and wiggle mine back too. Hidan and Deidara smirked; Itachi, Kakuzu, Pein, and Sasori sighed; Kisame and Zetsu snickered; Konan giggled; and Tobi still managed to look innocent and naïve.

Pein coughed. "Well now that has been settled. We will stay here until we are able to return to our world."

I nodded in confirmation. Everything seemed so serious and badass, until something cut through the mood thoroughly.

Deidara's stomach growled. Loudly.

I facepalmed. Alyssa, a devoted fangirl of his, giggled. Everyone else snickered.

I dragged him to the kitchen, and everyone else essentially followed.

I showed them the insides and content of my refrigerator and freezer. "Do you guys mind if I make fried rice? I've got leftover rice I want to use." I asked them, and they said it was fine.

"Tobi likes fried rice!" Tobi yelled to no one in particular.

"Hannah makes killer fried rice. Just like everything she cooks," Alyssa assured a worried Deidara.

"Bitch, after cooking for you and me for like 5 years, it's kind of hard not to be good at cooking," I growled playfully, causing her to growl back.

Yeah.

We're weird.

Deal with it, bitch.

I took out some vegetables and started to chop them efficiently and quickly. Hidan gawked at me.

"How the fuck do you cut stuff so fast bitch?" I sighed.

"Hidan, my name isn't bitch. Second of all, like I said; 5 years of cooking experience, and my customer isn't too big on waiting for her food when she gets hungry," I grinned.

"Look at all the fucks I give bitch."

"Oh, fuck you you hygiene ignoring zealot," I said while setting my knife down after cutting up an onion.

"What the fuck was that bitch?! I'll fucking fight you!"

"I don't believe I stuttered dick. Come at me bro."

"Both of you, shut up," Kakuzu growled, even though we both were arguing with a playful tone.

I pouted, and sniffled dramatically. "Sooooooooooooooo meeeaaaaan _Kaku-chan_."

He growled again menacingly, "Don't call me Kaku-chan." However, his eyes betrayed he was amused.

Pein sighed. "Please do not purposely anger anyone Hannah." I grinned brightly.

"Awww...Pein, if you wanted to join the love fest, you could've just asked!" I cooed. His eyebrow twitched while Konan giggled at us.

"It's okay Pein. Not everyone has the courage to branch out to different people. The first step to recovering is to admit you're problems!" I said cheerfully while skipping over to hug him around his waist. Afterward, I patted his awesome ginger hair.

"Holy shit! You're hair is soft… I be jelly," I muttered. He smirked.

"I'm glad my hair is causing you such entertainment Hannah, but I would appreciate if you were to remove your hand from my head." I pouted. "Party pooper," I muttered, but stopped petting his head anyway because he asked nicely.

I washed my hands, and went back to cooking. Now, since I had 13 people to feed, that was a fucking big amount of fried rice, but due to me being lazy and not wanting to go to the store often, I stored up food like a greedy fat squirrel in the winter.

After I had fried the rice and veggies and made a few side dishes like Mapo Tofu and meat (for Zetsu), I set the food on the big dining table. Hidan, Deidara, Tobi, and Alyssa (the abrasive ones) cheered, while Pein, Konan, Itachi, and Kakuzu murmured their thanks.

"Itadakimasu!"

"Holy shit, this stuff is good!" Deidara shouted while eating ravenously.

"Hey bitch, give me some more of this fried rice!" Hidan demanded, while I rolled my eyes and complied.

"Hannah?" Konan asked sweetly. "Hmm?" "Could you show me how to make Mapo Tofu like this? When I make it it always turns out tough… I could help you make dinner for the guys sometimes." I smiled at her. I mean, how could you not smile at Konan? She was the most badass kunoichi in Naruto.

"Sure Konan. I would be happy to. If you ever want anything, you only need to ask. As for making dinner for the guys, that's not necessary." She smiled in response, and I could see Pein was also pleased by the good treatment of his partner. _'Note to self, take Konan and Alyssa on a girl's night out to ask her about her relationship with Pein… I totally need to set them up...'_

In a weird way, I was happy. The close family I had always wanted was in front of my very own eyes.

"Hannah? What should we do about where the Akatsuki will sleep? Also, isn't school tomorrow?" Alyssa asked, and my face turned stark white. A few members looked at me worried, while everyone stopped eating to look at me.

"Oh my god...I'm letting the Akatsuki, S-ranked criminals, stay at my house while I'm at school...My house is going to be ruined," I whimpered. The Akatsuki were silent; they couldn't come up with a response. I sighed, and rubbed my temples with my fingers.

"I'll have to set down some ground rules. One; do not kill people unless from my permission or necessary, which will not happen unless there is a burglar, murderer, rapist, or someone along the sorts threatening someone I care about. Two; do not injure me, Alyssa, our parents, or anyone else we care about. Three; obey what Pein or I say that are outside the list of these rules. Four; no ninjutsu, genjutsu, taijutsu, or anything else that's not really possible in our world unless Alyssa or I say so. Not the best way to keep down low. Four; do not disturb other people while in public. This will also raise unwanted attention. Five; obey these rules." I sighed. "That should about cover it." There was an awkward silence for a while, before Alyssa muttered while smirking, "Sounds like someone's got high expectations for their customers…"

I burst out laughing, and Alyssa couldn't hold it back either so she laughed too.

"Okay," I said while still snickering, "Now we decide the sleeping arrangements. Alyssa, are you going to sleep here tonight?" She nodded in confirmation.

"Alrighty then. Even though my house is huge, there aren't that many rooms; only the rooms are big. Pein and Konan can have the master bedroom; that's up the stairs and to the left. Hidan and Kakuzu can have the guest room; that's up the stairs and to the right. Tobi and Zetsu can have the other guest room, that's the room where you go up the stairs and go straight forward. Deidara and Sasori are with Alyssa, Kisame and Itachi are with me."

No one had any complaints (except for Hidan about Kakuzu being greedy except being said with all of his potty mouth gloryness), so they all (minus Hidan) went quietly to their respective rooms.

Little did I know, the night would turn out to be very interesting...

* * *

Hope you had fun reading!

I had fun writing this chapter, but I need more Tobi goofball-ness and Zetsu's awesomeness, along with Kisame and all of his seafood-loving coolness in there.

I know I'm focusing on Hannah a lot, but I'll try to switch it up every once in a while...

I'm sorry for any mistakes.

Reviews, reviews, reviews; I want so many good reviews~

Good day!


	7. Walking On Eggshells

Yay! New chapter!

This one is really long; I'm proud of it (and me for writing this on a busy school day).

I hope you enjoy the chapter (Warning: some perverted stuff happens here. It's rated T for a reason... :3).

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

They would find the clothes in the closets of their rooms, luckily. As I watched Alyssa lead Deidara and Sasori to her room that she always stayed in when she slept here (which she decorated to the point that is was like a second bedroom) Kisame and Itachi had walked over to me.

"Where's your room?" Itachi asked, snapping me out of my trance.

"Err, sorry. Follow me." I walked over to the staircase and they trailed behind me. I walked to my room, opened the door, and waited for their reaction.

* * *

Nobody's P.O.V.

As Hannah opened the door and stepped in, Itachi and Kisame followed in but froze.

The walls were covered in posters.

A few of them had the partners depicted, but there were many, many others had the Akatsuki, Naruto characters, and others had Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood characters, Fate/Stay Night, Bleach, and others. Also, on a dresser there were various plushies, accessories, and other anime related objects.

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

As my roommates for the night had stood there gawking at the poster filled room and their mini-me's, I had gone to get my set of clothes to change in after I showered.

"I'm going to shower first, if that's alright for you guys." They nodded, still in awe at my decorated room.

As I was showering, I thought about how they had transformed. The water was warm as it had reached their paws, so If I was correct, cold water made them turn into cats, and warm/hot water turned them back into humans.

Thankfully it was that instead of the other way around.

I didn't want to make them shower with only cold water.

Even if they were ninjas…

My gaze lingered over the bathtub I had placed them in, and my eyes wandered over to where Itachi was standing. As I remembered what I had seen, I blushed. No one needed to know that.

Forcing those thoughts to the back of my mind, I turned off the shower water and changed into simple black pajama pants and a soft thick dark green cotton shirt with SCIENCE in big white letters on it. Below it, it said, 'IT WORKS, BITCHES'. I also brushed my teeth before leaving the bathroom.

As I stepped out of the bathroom door, Kisame raised an eyebrow at my pajamas.

"Not exactly the most fashionable pajamas I've ever seen," he remarked, but I didn't sense any mocking tone or sarcasm in his voice, so I shrugged it off.

"Hun, if you want what's 'fashionable' here, you can go to the hoes at my school. They're 'fashionable', but they wear the most suggestive clothing I've ever seen." I shuddered. "I'll stick with these, thanks. It's not also a very true thing to say if you're only wearing a towel yourself." He snickered, and I patted his blue hair good naturedly.

"Is it alright if I go next?" Kisame asked. I grinned in response. "Sure. Just try not to shower too long. I mean, shower long enough to actually shower, but don't use use up all the hot water. I'm fairly sure the rest of the Akatsuki would also appreciate some hot water when they shower. You can brush in there too; just open a new toothbrush, I have a lot in there. Same for you Itachi, and I also want to test something out with you, if that's alright." He dipped his head politely.

As Kisame walked into the steaming depths of my bathroom, the room lapsed into a comfortable silence. I could hear the noise and shouting coming from Alyssa's room, even though it was through a few closed doors. I had no doubt that she was having fun with her Deidara and Sasori.

"Hannah?" Itachi asked, his face unusually blank. I blinked in surprised. "You mentioned that you knew about the Akatsuki members correct?" I nodded. "How much...do you know about me?" At this point, his voice dropped to a dangerous murmur.

I gulped. I was treading on eggshells here. I knew that Itachi was a pacifist, but he would not have mercy on someone who could reveal all of his secrets.

"I-I…" I stammered.

I had a few options.

1. Tell him the truth, and possibly save his life in the future.

2. Tell him I only know a little bit, but he could probably tell I was lying at this point, even if I was a good liar.

3. Tell him I didn't know anything, but like option 2, he would tell I was lying.

"I...I know everything. Your family, your order from the elders, the massacre, your relationship with your brother, everything." I managed to say, following option 1. He froze, his eyes narrowed dangerously, and he closed them slowly. I waited, my breathing suddenly sounding very loud in the silent room. I felt my heart pounding in my chest painfully.

"What happens in the future?" He asked. I sighed, it's not like keeping secrets would help in any way now.

"You...you fight Sasuke, and you die. Even though you tried to keep the truth from him, someone else tells him," I said sadly. Itachi was my favorite character, along with Sasuke up there. I did not like the idea of my favorite character, who I now knew now was a real person, being killed by his beloved younger brother who eventually becomes insane. It just wasn't fair. I didn't notice it, but a small tear rolled down my cheek.

"Itachi, I don't want you to die. I don't want any of the Akatsuki to die. So I have a proposal for all of you guys." I took a deep breath. "I want all of you to watch your deaths in this world, and when you guys go back to your world, you can prevent your deaths. Some, like yours, I will keep private just for the individual." I waited for his response, and he opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by the door opening.

We both turned to look at Kisame, whose hair was still wet from the shower.

"You can tell me what you think of that idea later," I said to Itachi, who nodded.

I told Kisame to grab some clothes from inside the closet that fit him.

"Hey Hannah, didn't you say you wanted to try something with Itachi?" Kisame asked.

"Oh yeah!" I bopped my fist into my open palm. Itachi sighed, and Kisame smacked his forehead.

I giggled, and I grabbed Itachi by the hand and dragged him into the bathroom. "Onward to Narnia!" Kisame snickered, and Itachi chuckled. It must have been my imagination, but I thought I felt Itachi squeeze my hand back slightly before letting go.

"Okay Itachi, I'm sorry for using you as a guinea pig, but I need to see how your guys' transformation works. First I'll try turning you into a kitty with warm water, which I think won't work." He nodded, and I got some warm water into a cup. I ordered him into the bathtub, and I gently poured the warm water over his hair.

Nothing happened.

"Okay," I said, "I think using cold water will now make you turn back into a cat."

I got cold water in the cup again, and I poured it on his head.

A loud poof was heard in the room, and the smoke cleared to reveal a twitching black Karasu.

I giggled, and picked up the kitty-fied Itachi, who shivered in his tiny kitten body. I dried off his glossy midnight black pelt, and rubbed my cheek over the top of his head. "So soft and cute…"I giggled, earning a chuckle from Kisame and a small smirk from kitty Itachi. After having my fill of petting the cat, I set him back in the tub. I filled the cup with warm water, and poured the water on his small head, forgetting what happened next.

A loud poof, and smoke filled the room again. I coughed a little at the smoke, but turned my eyes back to the now human Itachi.

The now naked human Itachi.

After my eyes widening and a deep blush forming on my cheeks, I screamed softly and buried my face into my hands.

Kisame started laughing, not being bothered by the naked male who happened to be his partner.

"Why are you so surprised? It's not like you reacted this bad the first time when you were staring at me," Itachi teased playfully, causing Kisame to laugh even harder and for me to blush even more and to bury my face into my hands again.

"Ju-just go into the shower!" I wailed pathetically, running for the door. Kisame's laughter and Itachi's chuckles filled my ears as I ran out, flopping on my bed. Kisame stepped into my room a few moments later.

"Hey Kisa? Do you guys care about where you sleep tonight?" I asked. He shook his head no.

"We wouldn't have the heart to go bossing you two girls around when we are your guests," he explained, causing me to go 'awwww'. "Kisame, you're so sweet. If only Hidan was that way…" my voice turning from giggly to sour in a few seconds. He grinned lopsidedly, and I gave him a hug.

The door opened to reveal an almost naked Itachi who was still a little wet from the shower, with little droplets of water rolling down his perfectly formed chest and abs.

Did I mention about his abs before?

His chest was perfectly sculpted, having a clear eight-pack, but not being overly muscular. It was almost hypnotizing to watch his chest as he walked because you could see the taut skin ripple, and I felt like drooling. His arms also were thin and long, but you could see the muscle in them too.

He was just so yummy.

In a non-Zetsu kind of way.

Kisame, on the other hand, was really muscular. Not in the way that it seemed like he was fat (like those pictures of wrestlers), but you could see the clear bulging muscles.

Kisame and Itachi both noticed me staring at Itachi's chest, and they both smirked. Itachi, being the meanie-butt he was, rippled the muscles in his chest purposefully. "You, sir are a meanie-butt," I whimpered. He chuckled, but walked over to the closet and picked out a simple black shirt and black sweatpants. I turned away as he put on the outfit, and when I turned back, I frowned.

"How the heck do you wear something as simple as that and still look as sexy as hell?" I pouted, earning a chuckle from the Uchiha, and he leaned in closer to me. "Well, apparently I can wear nothing, and still look as sexy as hell," he whispered huskily , his lips brushing lightly against my ear.

I shoved him gently, and he walked back chuckling again as my face turned red.

"I - you little - but - you pervert!" I stammered. Kisame was watching our exchange with an amused look. "Are you sure I'm the pervert? Who was the one staring?" Itachi asked seductively. I gaped at him. I turned to Kisame. "He didn't just call me a pervert did he? Oh my god, he called me a pervert…" I said dramatically. "I don't think I'll ever recover…"

I sighed. "You guys are so mean…" They both snickered at me. "Anyway, where do you guys want to sleep? Any preferences?" They both glanced at each other. "You're the host, you should decide," Itachi said firmly. I frowned. "How did you guys become criminals? You're too nice…"

"Because when Leader-sama chooses who is in the Akatsuki, he has a requirement that you must care where you sleep when you are a guest in someone else's house," Kisame teased. I nodded in mock earnest, keeping my face straight. "Exactly! He needs to make you put that in your resume when you sign up for the Akatsuki." We all laughed at this.

"Okay then. My bed can fit two people with a little extra space, but not much, and I can drag out an inflatable mattress for the third person. I don't think that Kisame and someone else would fit in the bed though. Sorry Kisa..." I said. Kisame just shrugged.

"I'm a S-ranked criminal, I've slept in worse conditions than on the floor." I grinned and pet his awesome blue hair. I went downstairs, and along the way I visited each room in turn to see if everything was alright. I got extra pillows and a blanket for Kisame, and when I got back to the room I set up Kisame's bed for him. I climbed into my bed and Itachi climbed in after me. I turned on my side, hugging an extra pillow I got, which was a habit of mine when I was asleep; I tended to hug stuff. I began to blink tiredly, and about five minutes later I was asleep.

* * *

I hope you enjoyed reading. I'm sorry for any mistakes.

Please review! It makes me very happy :)

It also makes me smile for no reason when I walk through my school halls...

Oh well. The world will never know why.

Goodbye!


	8. Faith Can Move Mountains

Hello peeps!

I am so so so so so sooooooo sorry for the late update.

I've been having a lot going on in my life, with physics and biology tests and Halloween.

I hope you understand.

I also wanted to make this chapter long for you guys in apology for it being late (which also made it be updated even later…)

Enjoy the chapter! Sorry for any mistakes, I wrote this on an iPad.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, just Hannah and Alyssa...

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

I blinked my eyes blearily and the first thing I felt was a slight squeeze of arms around my waist. A voice mumbled quietly in their sleep.

I turned around slowly, and came face to face with an adorable sleeping Itachi.

He had taken off his shirt in an attempt to get comfortable last night, as well as his hair which was now splayed all over his pillow. Therefore, he was now susceptible to me eye-raping him.

As I continued to ogle him while he was asleep, I got an idea. I had checked my phone and I surprisingly still had a bunch of time left because I had woken half an hour early. I took a few pictures of him as he was asleep, to keep for later use (and my enjoyment).

Just to see how he would react, I leaned my face closer until I could feel his breath on my face.

Then I turned my head and gave him a sweet peck on his cheek, near his lips.

His eyes snapped open with alarm, and black bled into red.

I 'eeped' quietly, and after he had realized it was me, his eyes turned back into the regular beautiful onyx.

He blinked a few times, "Enjoying yourself?" I grinned innocently. He frowned. "Don't give me that look," he growled sexily. I giggled.

"I can't take you that seriously if you look so damn sexy," I pouted. He smirked in response.

I unraveled Itachis arms from around my waist. I gently climbed over him to the edge of the bed, only to be caught by him once again in his arms. "Damn it," I pouted. He chuckled in response, which makes me (not) ashamed to say that my heart fluttered a bit before speeding up. I slipped out from under his arms, and gently shook Kisame's shoulder. "Kisa! I'm going to make breakfast now." He opened his eyes warily, before noticing it was me. He grinned, and rumpled my hair.

I got my change of clothes and changed in the bathroom. I flew down the stairs and into the kitchen, only to find Pein, Konan, Kakuzu, Sasori, Deidara, Tobi, Zetsu, Itachi, Kisame, and a half-dead Alyssa. I smirked, and walked over to Alyssa to give her a hug, and as I wrapped my arms around her slouching body, I whispered into her ear, "Chocolate chip waffles."

Her eyes widened. I quickly wrapped my arms around her tighter.

"OH MY GOD WE'RE HAVING CHOCOLATE CHIP WAFFLES?! I WANT CHOCOLATE CHIP WAFFLES!" she screamed rather enthusiastically. I patted her head. "I'm glad you're awake. Do you want the usual amount?" She nodded vigorously. Sasori sighed, and his partner grinned at her enthusiasm.

I quickly made lots of batter considering that I had 12 people to feed, and stirred in lots of chocolate chips, the way Alyssa liked it.

Since I usually made breakfast from scratch each morning, regardless of school or not, I woke up ridiculously early. "Oh yeah, why did you guys get up so early?" I asked, curious. "We typically wake up at 5:30 or 6:00. It's just in our schedule," Kakuzu said. I nodded sagely, and I poured the batter into my waffle machines. Since I was used to Alyssa eating like a horse (she wasn't so hungry she could eat a horse, she ate like a horse hungry enough to eat another hose), I had a ridiculous amount of waffle machines. This also proved beneficial to not be late for school, even though I had started breakfast ten minutes earlier. I had started to wonder how Alyssa even woke up this early. "Hey guys, how did Alyssa wake up this early? It's nearly impossible to wake her, unless I'm the one doing it. The story behind how much she trusted me was actually quite interesting…

* * *

_Flashback - Hannah's P.O.V._

_It was a normal school day for Alyssa and I. We were in 9th grade, and it was the first month of high school. It was a Monday._

_Since Alyssa was so pretty, lots of guys hit on her. One new one, I noticed staring at her, was the jock Jake Moore. That was abnormal, considering that he had a girlfriend, Summer White, who also was the biggest slut in the school. She had clothing that was disgusting. Normally, it consisted of a half-see through ridiculously tight shirt and a bright neon bra underneath, and shorts so short they were practically underwear. I had been Jake's partner once, and just saying; he was dumb. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that because I am so smart, but he was just so dumb compared to normal standards. The class we had been partnered in was Health. Health, and he couldn't get stuff right. Not even Math. It was ridiculous._

_Anyway, he continued to stare at her, and I dragged Alyssa away when the bell rang, heading to our next class together. Since I was so antisocial, I had begged the people who arranged the classes to put me and Alyssa together. They had agreed begrudgingly, just because they were bribed with money._

_I use my resources._

_Anyway, I needed to go to the bathroom, so I bid goodbye to Alyssa during study hall._

_After I had done my business, I washed my hands when I heard voices speaking to each other._

_"Oh my god, did you hear?" "What?" "You know, Summer broke up with Jake! I think she got bored of him, and he didn't like to be bossed around by the hag." "Really?! Geez, she doesn't have only one boy-toy now…" I dried my hands, and I stepped out of the bathroom, pondering on this morning._

_If what I heard was true, then Jake was interested in Alyssa._

_Like hell that's going to happen._

_From my memory though, he was a bit...short on the forgiveness factor and patience factor._

_Still, to get to Alyssa, he would have to get past me._

_I hope he has fun trying anyway._

_I had walked back to class just as the bell rang for the end of school._

_I saw Jake talking to Alyssa near in an empty hall and Alyssa had a look that no one else but me could decipher; she had a fake smile that looked real, but I could see her real emotion underneath._

_She. Was. Pissed._

_He looked smug, and she looked like she wanted to kick him where the sun don't shine._

_I crept closer, trying to see what they were talking about. I took out my phone, and started recording the exchange just in case._

_"C'mon, you know you want to…" he purred in what he probably thought was a seductive voice, but to me it sounded like he was constipated._

_"Shut up, you son of a bitch. The only people who want to sleep with you are ugly whores. I am neither ugly, or a whore. I can do so much better than you. Heck, no girls, even the ugliest whores will want to sleep with you when I'm done with you, cause you can't even sleep with them, if you know what I mean," she snarled._

_His eyes narrowed, and I know Alyssa crossed his line. He stepped forward, and he grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head as he essentially shoved her into the wall. She tried to escape, but he was on the football team for a reason. She screamed, trying to get other people's attention, but no one was there._

_"Shut up, you bitch," he snarled, and he attempted to take off her shirt. Tears appeared in her eyes in fear. This was enough for evidence. I shut off my phone, and ran at Jake and punched his face._

_He crashed to the ground, and I pulled Alyssa out of his grip. Her eyes widened, and she grinned happily._

_"Hey, the only person who can order my bitch around is me, bitch," I yelled at him, and kicked him in the groin, hard. I stomped on his stomach for good measure._

_He groaned pitifully in pain, curling up into a ball on the floor, and I grabbed Alyssa's hand and we ran to the office._

_Since it was only thirty minutes after school, people were still in the office._

_I hurriedly explained what had happened. and I showed them the video on my phone._

_I knew that he wouldn't get expelled, maybe just suspended a few day, but this would go on his transcript._

_He deserved it._

_They said he would get punished for his actions, but was rich, just like us and he had a lot of supporters, many from the girls._

_When he got back to school, he would probably make up some weird story of how Alyssa asked him to do...that._

_That was going to change, fast._

_When I called a taxi to come to our school and pick us up, I told Alyssa of my plan, and she smiled sadistically._

_She had grown so much from the timid girl who fell from my tree when she was eight._

_I was so proud of her._

_After I got home, I quickly typed in the emails of everyone I knew, including people from a few other schools. I attached the video, and I told them to send the email to everyone they knew._

_Knowing the nature of the people in my school, this would already be the topic of gossip tomorrow._

_We cackled evilly, and waited for tomorrow._

_After what happened that day, she wanted to stay at my house. I called her parents and told them what happened and let Alyssa talk to her parents._

_They were outraged. They said they were going to sue the school if they didn't expel him._

_We soothed the pair, and said that the school was fine, but Jake would not be bothering us soon._

_They said that whatever Alyssa and I thought was best, they would follow._

_That night, I let her sleep in my bed, and I had my arm curled protectively around her._

_Over time, we had become like sisters. Nothing could separate us. Ever._

_The next morning, we happily walked to school, a mocking smile plastered all over our faces._

_We waited for thirty minutes before Jake finally appeared._

_His face was black and blue where I had punched him. He had bags under his eyes, and he was limping slightly._

_I whistled in admiration of my job yesterday. I hadn't even gone full out._

_Everyone was whispering, pointing at him in disbelief. I knew that the news had spread nicely._

_He saw us and froze, fear filling his eyes. The mock smile extended throughout my face, and his face turned a pale white. I sauntered over to him, and he set his jaw, preparing for a blow._

_But I wasn't that stupid. I would probably be suspended for hitting him for no reason._

_After I reached him, I brought my mouth close to his ear and whispered a few words, leaned back, and Alyssa and I walked to our lockers. He broke out into a sweat and he ran frantically in the opposite direction we had went, everyone giving him a wide berth._

_I smiled as I remembered what I had spoken._

_"Next time you try, I won't stop at just bruises. Consider yourself lucky."_

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

I shrugged. Deidara probably woke her up, or Sasori. Just like how I like Itachi best and Kisame a lot too, she liked Deidara and Sasori.

I took out the waffles after they finished cooking.

I noticed that Deidara grinned at Alyssa as she grabbed her 7 waffles just as I set them down in front of her, and she started to pile up whipped cream on top and strawberries.

I sat down at my spot, and started putting butter and whipped cream on my waffles. The rest of the Akatsuki grabbed waffles and started eating,

'Along with Konan and Pein, I need to talk with the girls about Deidara and Alyssa...they're like, perfect for each other...'

I didn't notice I was staring at them, until Itachi caught my eye and raised an eyebrow. I smiled at him, confused, before he turned back to his food.

Konan and my eyes' met, and we smiled in understanding as we subtly watched the pair interact.

I guess the way to a man's heart is really through the stomach…

I guess it's all the better then that I had made a lot of food, because now that I think about it, I'm feeding another 10 people.

Which includes one sweet woman, and nine males.

Nine very incredible males in the aspect of the proportion of their stomach and body size.

I mean, I get Kisame and Kakuzu, but really?

I had make like a mountain of waffles, and they were gone in minutes.

Either they had supernatural powers, or they just were really efficient.

Alyssa and I packed our backpacks for school, and we went upstairs to brush our teeth.

After my teeth had been cleaned, I discussed with Pein, Konan, and Itachi about what I would allow at my house while we were gone.

"Number one; no ninjutsu, genjutsu, and taijutsu when I'm gone. Essentially no funky non-human activities that will get us noticed by the po-po. Number two; no turning on any ovens or stoves or anything. You guys should be able to last on cold food for lunch for now, but I'll arrange a way later for you guys to be able to eat a hot lunch. Number three; don't mess up my house. I guess Kakuzu will help this happen, because anything damaged must be replaced with your money. Ummm...just don't do anything stupid. Think about whether or not you would act like that in front of me," I listed. Itachi nodded. "We will not allow anyone to break these rules, and if they do we shall allow you to decide the punishment," he assured, and Pein voiced his agreement to the rules.

I bid goodbye to the Akatsuki as Alyssa and I started to walk off to school.

* * *

I'm sorry. In this chapter, not a lot of stuff happens. I apologize once more for the late update.

You got to see some of their past though. I looked back at it, and it was a looong flashback.

Please please pleeeasseee review. As DaniZaraki would say, 'I would be a pleased banana.'

Good bye.


	9. Walking On Thin Ice? Might As Well Dance

Hello people of the world!

I'm so sorry for the (very) late update! I think the original thrill of publishing a story is wearing off, but I **swear** I'm not abandoning this story. I think an update per week on the weekend or even longer might be regular now... :'(

Please review. It's the only thing that's keeping this story going, and I just don't find motivation with only myself posting and no one reviewing.

To this of you who have reviewed so far, thank you! Those are the only reason we've gotten as far as nine chapters.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Naruto franchise. I do own Alice and Alyssa though. I bought them for $5.

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

After I got to school, arms wrapped around my torso tightly from behind. I spun around in shock, ready to strike my attacker with my fist, before stopping in confusion. I sighed. My eyes found a handsome boy with slightly long spiky white hair and electric blue eyes. He was easily the most popular boy in our grade, being athletic, smart, and good-looking. I was friends with him for a few years, but it was clear to each other that no romantic feelings were harbored, even though we would pretend to be in love for the amusement of Alyssa and the horror of the other girls.

It was pretty damn funny, if I do say so myself.

"Skyler!" I whined. "Don't do that! You know I hate hugs!" He grinned impishly. "Exactly why I did it." I frowned.

Alyssa popped out from behind me. "Hi Sky!" she chirped happily.

"Hey Alyssa, do you like hugs?" he asked. "Heck yeah!" she crowed. "Would you like one?" "Of course sweetie!"

Sky and Alyssa started skipping toward each other dramatically, hearts floating around them. They threw their arms around the other's torso, and I smacked my forehead against the wall.

"Okay...let's go..." I muttered. They grinned at each other. "_Do you want a hug Hannah?_" They said with Yamato's creeper face. My face turned sickly white, and I started fleeing down the hall, fearing for my life. Sky caught up to me, held me in place, and Alyssa caught up to me a few moments later. I almost could imagine my ribs breaking. I gasped for air. "Can't breathe..." They let go of me, and Alyssa started dragging me to our first class, AP Literature, and Sklyer skipped happily behind.

* * *

_Flashback - Hannah's P.O.V._

_Alyssa and I found that we had the exact same schedule (that we had requested ever so politely(a.k.a we bribed the principal)), and to our surprise, we found another boy with the same schedule as ours whose name was Skyler Turner. The principal thought it would be a good idea to get to know this new kid who just moved to our city and help him around._

_As we were heading to our first class, a boy with stark white hair and electric blue eyes walked up to us. "Wait!" he shouted. I turned around and raised an eyebrow at him. He held up his schedule to my face and pointed at his first class, AP Literature, the same as us. "Do you know where this class is?" I blinked a few times, before my eyes wandered to the top of the sheet to his name._

_Skyler Turner._

_I sighed. "Are you the new kid?" I asked. He grinned widely, "Yep!" "I'm not sure if the principal explained this to you, but you were supposed to be led around by two people by the name of Hannah Lee and Alyssa Nelson. Did he mention this to you?" I asked._

_"Are you stalking me?" he said cautiously. I grinned in response. "I'm Hannah, and the idiot behind me is 'Lyssa" I said, and Alyssa pouted. "So mean..."_

_"Well?" I asked as Alyssa and I started walking, "are you coming?"_

_He grinned so widely I thought his face would split in half._

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

As we headed into the classroom, I felt the familiar killing intent and sighed.

"When are you ever going to give up?" I asked in monotone to the scantily clad Summer White, who actually (not surprisingly) wasn't in this class, but always went here every morning demanding Alyssa to 'give up' on Jake (who also is not dating Summer at this point anyway). Usually we showed up about thirty minutes early at the latest, and when she had figured out our habit that was also convenient for her, she came in here, dressed like a stripper.

Every. Flippin'. Day.

It got Alyssa pretty pissed off after a while too, so instead of just sticking to the good ol' 'leave us alone' line, we began getting more creative. "Hello Summer! Have a good time with yourself lately?" Alyssa said seductively, and wiggled her eyebrows at Summer dramatically. She sputtered a bit, before spewing incredulously, "Did you catch me?" Our foreheads wrinkled in disgust, "Ew, do you actually do it? You'd think you would have enough boy-toys to do it for you but damn… We just asked if you had a good summer, but I guess that's already answered." She glared at us, her pale face turning a bright red from with anger or embarrassment (or quite possibly both).

"You little - ! Of course I don't do it! You can't insult me! You aren't popular - " she sputtered nervously.

"Alyssa's number one overall, you're just liked for your body." Face redness level: 3

"Or smart - "

"Dayum bitch, do you live under a rock? We always get into the top 5%, and that's just because of me being lazy. Hannah gets into the top 1% easily, and gets into national levels for so many olympiads its ridiculous. What do you get, like the 50%?" Face redness level: 5

"Or pretty - "

I gestured at Alyssa and raised an eyebrow, nonplussed, at the school slut. Face redness level: 8

"Or have good clothes - "

I burst out laughing. "Hun, you can't have good clothes when you don't really actually wear clothes~" I snickered. Face redness level: over 9,000

The teacher suddenly walked in, and raised an eyebrow at Summer expectantly. "Do you have anything to speak to me about Miss White?" She open and closed her mouth, undoubtedly trying to think up of an excuse (in which she looked oddly like a fish) before stomping off, huffing indignantly. He turned to us and smiled a little. Mr. Butler was by far one of the most awesome teachers ever. He was strict, but let things slide if acceptable. He also had a wicked sense of humor. Since he knew about the situation with Summer, he constantly held things back enough for it not to get violent.

"We got a recording this time," I grinned, and held out my iPhone with voice memo open, and pressed the stop button. He barked a laugh, and took the phone from my hands, replaying what happened that morning. By the end he was shaking with silent laughter, and gave me my phone back. "Nice one," he grinned, shaking his head good-naturedly. "Why does she bother you anyway? Hasn't she learned that this isn't going to amount to anything yet?"

"Trust me Mr. Butler, we've been asking ourselves that for a long time," Alyssa and I deadpanned simultaneously.

The rest of the first three periods of AP Lit, AP Euro, and AP Bio flew by without a hitch (except for the fact that everyone was complaining about the gross video we saw before lunch, which I thought wasn't all that gross), and after lunch everything was a blur until P.E.

"Hahahaha! Today is the day I shall beat you - " Summer cackled before getting hit in the face with a dodgeball by Skyler. Hard.

And people wonder why I love him so much.

"Boom! Headshot!" Alyssa crowed loudly, and Summer's face turned beet red.

"You'll pay for this!" She shouted, pointing a finger at our general direction dramatically.

"I can't even count how many times you've said that…and you're the dumb one," I muttered, and she gasped indignantly in protest.

Only to get hit in the face again by a ball thrown by yours truly.

She glowered at me (which to me was just as intimidating as a kitty-fied Hidan) and stomped off to the locker room screaming, her groupies following behind like the little minions they were.

Alyssa and I high fived each other, before we ganged up on Skyler and tackled him to the ground and hugged the crap out of him.

Payback is sweet, bitch.

"Oh yeah…Hannah, can we please please please tell Sky about the kitties? I mean the real them," Alyssa pleaded. I considered it for a moment before I sighed.

"Fine. Only if he keeps quiet about it though," I sighed, and Alyssa whooped in victory. Sky looked confused, and I said, "You'll have to see when we get to my house."

"Do I even get a choice in this?" he raised an eyebrow at me, and I smiled innocently.

"Yep! It's either come with us quietly," My smile turned into a sinister grin, "or we drug you, tie you up, do dirty things to you, and you end up coming anyway."

"That sounds dirty," he frowned, not at all fazed by my master plan to make him come. "Thats because it is, my sweet," Alyssa cackled along with me, wiggling her eyebrows at him.

"Fine, I'll go to your house," he groaned, and Alyssa and I high fived each other.

"But…" he began, and Alyssa and raised our eyebrows at him.

"Can you like, get off first? I can't breathe…" he gasped.

We got off, and we set out back to my house.

"Come to think of it, won't Sky flip like 5 tons of shit?" Alyssa said calmly, putting her pointer finger to her chin in thought. I looked at her and shrugged. "Do I want to know?" Skyler deadpanned.

"Nope~!" we giggled, causing him to sigh, "Am I the only sane one here?"

"Would you like to repeat that mister," I said with poison laced behind the innocent tone in my voice. He paled, and shook his head vigorously.

"Good, because I dun wanna hurt my wittle Sky~" I cooed, and he smacked his forehead in frustration.

We reached my house in a few minutes, and I told Alyssa to keep Sky there for a few minutes until I would signal her to come in.

I slipped into the door quickly and shut it so Sky couldn't see inside.

I was greeted by the sight of a strangely non-damaged and slightly cleaner house that I had left in the morning. Itachi was sitting on the couch reading Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and he raised his head as he noticed me entering. "I supervised everyone to make sure they behaved. Did you have a good day Hannah?" he asked politely, and I smiled in response. "Yep! Can you get everyone else here please? If they're naughty, I can resort to using my loud voice…" I said, and he dipped his head and disappeared in a whirl of black feathers, no doubt from his crows. "That was cool…" I breathed in awe, causing Kisame to snicker at me when he walked toward me. "You mean shark you," I pouted, causing him to ruffle my hair good-naturedly.

I was greeted by two more people when one grunted at me and the other shouted and swore loudly.

"Hey! Shit-ass bitch! When the fuck did you get back?" he shouted, causing me to stare at him boredly. "Five minutes ago Hidan. Hello Kakuzu," I said, my voice turning more cheerful as I greeted the miser. He grunted back, and I turned to see the long blond-haired pyro and the puppet that everyone loves.

I mean, not really, but go with it…

"Hey Dei-Dei! Hello Pinocchio~!" Said pair raised their eyebrows at me. "Dei-Dei?" "Pinocchio?" They asked at the same time. I giggled a bit, before Deidara asked, "Where's Alyssa?" "Awww, do you miss her?" I cooed, and his face turned bright red. "N-No!" He stuttered nervously.

Sasori gave a lopsided grin and said, "He was talking about her all day," he smirked, causing the blond to sputter.

I had to clap both of my hands over my mouth to stop me from laughing so hard. Pein, Konan, Tobi, and Zetsu came down the stairs, and I greeted them and they greeted me back with varying results.

"Hello Lee-san."

"Hello Hannah, welcome back. How was your day?"

"Hello Hannah-chan! Tobi is a good boy!"

"Hello Hannah. **Hey bitch.** Don't say that, it's not nice! **Shut up, idiot.**"

"Everyone! Alyssa and I brought over a friend today, but he's trustworthy. He might try to attack some of you though, if it seems that you're perverted...watch out Hidan," I smirked, causing him to glare at me.

"Okay...Alyssa! Sky! Your can come in now!"

The door opened, and Alyssa stepped in before Skyler, and his eyes widened considerably and his jaw dropped open.

_'Shit.'_

* * *

Once again, I'm so sorry for the late update.

Review. It basically indirectly hits the 'post new chapter' button.

By the way, do you guys like the chapter titles? I do.

Goodbye~!


	10. Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction

I'm so so so so soooooooooooooooooo sorry

I've been really busy, and my fickle mind does not like to stay loyal to one anime for a long time... I'm getting out of my Akatsuki/Itachi phase...

Try to enjoy the horribly late kinda short chapter!

Disclaimer: If you can read this fanfiction, I'm fairly sure you're not ridiculously stupid and you know that this is _Fan_Fiction.

* * *

Hannah's P.O.V.

"W-what? Hannah, what's going on here? Why are the A-Akatsuki doing in your house?" Skyler stammered. I winced, seeing the outcome of this situation.

It was not going to be pretty.

Alyssa, being the ignorant idiot she is and not noticing the tense atmosphere said, "Well, you see! Hannah found a box near her garbage bins and opened it and she found kitties! Then she took them in, we named them, and then when we tried to give them a bath with water, then poof! Naked Akatsuki, at your service!" I smacked my forehead against the nearby wall (thinking about it, I really should stop doing that), and snarled loudly, "Alyssa! Way to make it any less blunt you retard!"

She blinked a few times, before wincing and looking at Skyler hesitantly, finally realizing the same thing I did before. She winced when she saw his eyes turn murderous. "Way to notice the situation now Alyssa," I sighed.

_Sky was going to kill someone._

"Sky! You can't kill them! I'm still a virgin!" Alyssa cried, getting weird looks from the Akatsuki, a sigh from me, a slight blush from Deidara, and a naughty grin and wolf-whistle from Hidan.

Two words: bad choice.

Sky whipped around to glare at Hidan. If I were to rank his killing intent Naruto-style, I say it'd probably be A-rank killing intent.

It'd only go to S-rank when either of us were actually in danger.

"Hey! Immortal fucker! If you fucking think about touching Alyssa or Hannah I'll castrate you and shove your dick down your throat, make you choke on it, smash your head through the window, and hang you by a noose from the flagpole at school!" he snarled, causing me to giggle a little.

"That's assuming that he actually has a dick…" I snickered, causing Hidan to glare at me.

"Shut up fucking bitch! Besides, you would know if I had one or not when you fucking made us take a bath. You would've seen it," Hidan sneered, causing me to smirk.

"Sorry honey, but I was kind of looking at someone else. Besides, even if I was looking at you, how could I see it if you didn't have one?" I giggled, and winked at Itachi, who chuckled in turn.

Sky raised an eyebrow at me and Itachi. "What did you fucking do?" he asked, but I'm not sure if he was referring to me or him.

Either way, it probably wasn't very good.

I looked Sky in the eye (that rhymed!) and said, "I didn't see _anyone_ under the waist, I swear! B-Besides, it's an inside joke!"

"Inside joke?" Skyler said, disbelievingly.

"Yeah! You see...um...it's kinda a joke that...um...I like to...ogle...uhh...I-Itachi's c-chest?"

He gave me a flat look, before chuckling softly, which turned into big stomach-cramping laughs. Alyssa and I sweat-dropped at his sudden bipolar behavior.

"Uhhh...Skyler, have you finally lost it?" Alyssa asked nervously, and he just laughed harder.

"Sorry," he sniggered, wiping tears from his eyes as he calmed down. "It's just so _you_ to be perverted and shameless one second and shy and introverted the next, Hannah," he said, causing my cheeks to flame.

"I-I do not do that!" I shouted indignantly.

"Yes you do," Sky, Alyssa, Kisame, and Itachi deadpanned simultaneously.

"B-b-bu-" I stammered "Well, Alyssa sometimes likes to flirt shamelessly with random boys on the street and then give 'her' number to them, which actually is the number for Aquafina!" Alyssa blushed, and shoved me lightly, causing me to laugh with everyone else.

"Hey! You said you would never tell anyone about that! Besides, you were the one that came up with that idea!"

"Did _not_!"

"Did _too_!"

"Did _not_!"

"Did _too_!"

"Did _not_!"

"Did-"

"Shut up!" Sky shouted. We both stuck out our tongues at him childishly, causing the Akatsuki to laugh at our behavior.

"Well now," Konan giggled playfully, causing Pein to smirk too (D'awwwww~ :D).

Deidara smiled slightly at the sight of Alyssa squabbling with me. Sky narrowed his eyes at Deidara, before catching my eyes, and he raised an eyebrow at the mischievous twinkle in my eyes.

_'Still need to set those two up.'_

I thought about how I could do that, before my mind referred to a fanfic that I had read before. It was an ItachixOC story, but it could work in this case (A/N: It's called Acrobats by Sukki18! I command you to read it!). I grinned maliciously as the plan began to cement itself into my mind. Everryne turned to stare at me nervously as they saw the fright inducing expression on my face.

"Uh...are you ok Hannah?" Alyssa wondered what everyone was thinking.

"Just dandy," I grinned even wider, and everyone sweat dropped.

"You sure?" Sky's eyebrow twitched. I giggled, and chirped, "Yep!"

Everyone's eyes twitched except for Alyssa, who stared at me with a 'durr' face on.

I grinned sweetly, and they sighed.

"Okay...Sky, are you still going to murder someone?" I asked.

"Well, now that you mention it," he cackled, making Alyssa and I gulp in fear. He laughed it off, and we 'pheewed' in relief.

"...I'm bored. Sky, are you gonna go home or stay here?" Alyssa asked.

"Go home! Go home!" I did an imitation of that guy from Newsies.

Alyssa and Sky snickered, while the rest of the Akatsuki (as usual) looked confused.

"I'll stay here," Sky said.

"Okay then! Since we're all bored, let's have a party! You know, movies, games, snacks, the works!" I chirped happily. I always loved these kind of nights, because they're so fun, but it'd be 5x as fun with the Akatsuki here.

"Let's party!" Alyssa cheered.

* * *

Okay peeps!

I order you all to watch Attack on Titan/Shingeki no Kyojin.

I morphed from being in an Itachi phase to a Levi phase...

I command all of you to love him and his stoic clean freak awesomeness!

And I'm wondering if I should start an Attack on Titan LeviOC story...

What do you guys think?

R&R (rest and relax or read and review :P)


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